What are the ingredients you need to be happy?
Today I’ve decided we’re going to look at your life like it’s a cake.
Here’s your life:
Or maybe it currently looks more like this?!
A cake needs very specific ingredients in a specific order to make it look like it’s supposed to (and taste good too). And you’re no different my friend….seriously.
What are the specific ingredients you need on a daily, weekly or monthly basis that make all the difference to your health, wealth and happiness?
Most people do not approach their life this way. Instead they ask themselves, ‘What do I need in order to make money and survive?’, ‘What do I need to get ahead and impress?’ , ‘What do I need to feel good enough?’, ‘What do I need to do to look younger/thinner/taller?’
These are survival questions, ego questions, fear questions….or just the questions that we’ve been conditioned to ask ourselves.
We’re not used to asking ourselves, what it is that we REALLY need to be happy, to have a life that truly suits us and expresses who we are. What keeps us healthy, balanced, sane and experiencing as much joy as possible? What do you really want? It may not be what you’ve been conditioned to want at all!
And this is why I’m likening you to a cake. I hope you don’t mind too much? I’m generally quite happy with any metaphor that involves dessert.
What are the specific things that you need? Some people need to wake up and go outside everyday or meditate. Some people work best late into the evening, have their best ideas while gardening and need beauty around them to feel good. Others need to protect their sensitivity and not work in the middle of a city or need to see a friend once a day or sing 3 times a week.
What have you been conditioned to believe will suit you or you feel you SHOULD do? You could write down 5 things that you think you should do but don’t really enjoy. Here are 5 of mine:
1) Being sat at a desk 9-5. I need to move!
2) Being indoors all day. I need lots of fresh air.
3) Always being tidy. Sometimes I have to create creative mess.
4) Working 7/8+ hours a day. I work best in short intense bursts.
5) Doing one thing all day. I need and like lots of different types of work/activities.
What do you need? What makes you happy and balanced?
Here’s a list (don’t you love a good list?). Write down (or draw a picture) of the specifics for you of what sort of things you need and how often you need them for each category.
Exercise: riding my bike 5 times a week for a few miles. Dancing around my flat every day.
Now you have a go……
Amount/type/place of work:
Time to wake up:
I feel my best when:
Area to live in:
Clothes I love:
Types of people to be around:
You could almost write an endless list, please think of your own examples. Let the ideas come to you. This is why I invented the FUN TYPES, so that you could find out what type of activities suit you: link
If you’re lucky enough to be able to create the structure of your day, what structure REALLY suits you? If you work or have many other commitments, what can you add in, change or prioritise to make you happier? What would make your life start to look like the most sumptuous, delicious, beautiful cake? What would you love?
I know that life isn’t always easy or ideal but there’s always something that can make you feel better and happier…there’s always something that could be more fun. And when it’s more fun, you’re more likely to work more productively, have happier relationships and even attract more of what you’d love. So there! Here’s some hard evidence on the matter from Fox News: Play Boosts Creativity
It’s not just a nice thing or something to do when you’ve got time, or an option for other people but a priority for you to have now whoever you are and whatever your circumstances. Because (as cheesy as it sounds) this is about connecting with yourself, knowing yourself better and then creating a life that suits YOU, not your parents or teachers or employers or partner or that ad on TV but YOU and that will be slightly different for everyone. It’s about accepting and working with who you naturally are.
Part 2 My recent adventure-a quest to add ingredients to my cake life. (It’s a catchy title).
I recently decided to take a little adventure. A couple of years ago, I asked my blog readers to suggest things I should try for fun-I ended up doing trapeze https://theaanderson.com/trapeze/ Uni cycling and cake baking (how relevant) as I hadn’t done that in years. It was also suggested that I volunteer at a festival. I put that one on hold thinking that those days were behind me (isn’t volunteering at a festival for people younger then me?!) but last month (in a quest to follow my own advice and keep adding good ingredients to my life-I love the outdoors, being around people, working in a team, trying creative activities plus going on trips) I succumbed and took that fun challenge.
There are many many sorts of festival and this one was a very civilised affair, it wasn’t just about bands and booze (although that was on offer too). I love being around the sheer amount of creativity in a field-there’s dancing, singing, comedy, yoga, crafts, camp fires with adults letting themselves play and play like most people don’t allow themselves much in their everyday life.
For the price of our ticket, my friend and I became a stewards for 4 shifts over 4 days. I’ll admit it, I loved the festival but it was hard going from being relaxed and playful to wearing a tabard and a radio (but doesn’t that look suit me?!!) and having to be vigilant instructing people to,’ please don’t climb these trees, please be less drunk here and you can’t come in with that wrist band…it’s for health and safety.’ I definitely didn’t discover my new calling in life but I gathered more information about myself. And isn’t that the real job-to find out what you like and need. It’s probably a life long one. You can’t work all of this out with a pen and paper, you just have to be brave and try things sometimes.
And in the moments when we got tired, bored and fed up on our festival security duty, my friend and I managed to make each other laugh lots. And that is most definitely one of my ingredients for a happy life.
Laughter is healing of course. Laughter is imperative. It is vital. Laughter is freeing in ways that crying or grieving is not. Laughter can open you to a very high level of consciousness – the Buddha and Christ energy of joy, of pure unadulterated joy and peace. And laughter is remembrance that all is laughable. All is to be laughed at, to be laughed within.
Channeled by Lee Harris: http://leeharris.myshopify.com/collections/relationshipsandfamily/products/lee-harris-relationships